Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
