Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize
