it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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