she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize