my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
