Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
