Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Life is so much better after having sex.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Randomize
