Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
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