69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
