Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
