party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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