Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
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