Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I intend to get homeless drunk
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
