For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
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