You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
