Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
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