Porn is love you can see.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
