it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
They should really pass out barf bags in church
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
