you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
