is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
