I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
