it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
