Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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