So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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