i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
