dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize