This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I AM VODKA MAN
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
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