guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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