singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Randomize
