You work out of a Hotel?
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Randomize
