Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
