She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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