I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Randomize
