hell yes lets make some ravioli
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
