I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I think im going to throw up on grandma
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
