i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
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