bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
