you would pick up someone in the library
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
