The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
