I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
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