We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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