I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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