Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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