if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
you traded sex for a burrito?
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
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