That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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