ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
