Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
