I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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