I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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