cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Randomize
