I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
