Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I am spending my child support on dildos
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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